i did love him.
today, i smile bitterly of the past. of course, saying it could have been better is an understatement. i can only say it would be different. different from what it is now, if only i had been more brave.
im usually one who believes that regrets are pointless because there's always a reason why everything happens. whatever or however painful they are. but times like this pass by and im left wondering what could have been if only i was bolder and more decisive. i wonder if life could have been better. or if i may have been wrong maybe i could have known how it feels like to be one.
if i can only be dead in the end, i should have at least known how to live.
cheers now to you, for seemingly to be genuinely happy. for pursuing the dreams i once doubted you'll ever gonna reach. for all the right things coming your way. and for that life i may never get the chance to be a part of anymore.
i hope and pray you'll stay that way. happy. and constantly wearing that bright confident smile of yours. i'll lead myself on too. so that maybe someday, you'll be happy as well that i was able to make it happen too.
maybe things was never meant to be. and we weren't.
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